Hup toh soh - part II

Much To-Do about nothing (Life, 21 May)

'It was past midnight last Saturday and tantalisingly close to quitting time at work. Hurrah, my weekend is about to start. I was looking forward to a relaxing two days. I would sleep in, read the papers over breakfast and finish reading a very interesting book about Japanese home cooking. There was also a pile of magazines by my bedside to read and a box of chocolates to indulge in.

But then I remembered I wanted to get my parents a new vacuum cleaner, had to go water their plants, had to go check out some stuff for work and before i knew it, i had scribbled two-page To-Do list; one for Sunday and the other for Monday.

Even before it could take shape, my lazy weekend had shrivelled up and died.

While ricocheting from errand to errand the next day, head throbbing and blood pressure up because the bloody carparks were all full, i wondered - not for the first time - if i was stark, raving mad.

I'm not the only one either.

A colleague told me how she had planned to spend the three-day Vesak Day weekend reading, with a pot of coffee nearby. But then, there was the laundry to do, the groucery shopping and this and that. Needless to say, very little reading was done.

Another could not just have a casual conversation with a colleague. She automatically separated a big bag of lychees someone had brought to the office from their stalks. Kill two birds with one stone - why not?

Then there's the friend who is in no danger of becoming a couch potato. While watching television, she reads, tracks her family spending for the day and plans dinner menus for her family 10 weeks at a time.

Why can't we just relax, kick back and do nothing?

I don't know about them, but doing nothing makes me jittery and guilty..

It's a strange thing, this guilt. At the end of the week, I can say confidently that i have earned the rest.

But there is the niggling feeling that life is short and i have to make the most of it. And i suppose nothing beats the feeling i get when i've ticked all the stuff on my To-Do list.

Like many working people who have no time to socialise or run errands during the week, i also feel compelled to cram sa much as possibile into these two days.

Sitting aournd, watching television and eating chocolates can wait till i finish what needs to be done. But, alas, something else always needs to be done.

Despite all this, I have become better at relaxing over the years. I can now read for a couple of hours without getting out of my armchair to do anything more complicated than making another cup of tea. Recently, i surprised myself by having a nap.

The world hasn't ended, so maybe i can do more of it. It could make me a whole new person; calm, collected, you know, Zen..'

Hmm..maybe i should recruit this writer into the Hup Toh Soh club..