It's been quite a long while since i really sat down and blocked..wtf, i mean blogged..think i really got a writer's block..after the knock..(i kok my head yest, damn pain siah!)
After reading the article on introverts..i can safely say, yes I belong to the 'strong, silent' type..Maybe tat explains the lack of blogs these days..i think by thinking, not talking nor blogging..and so the thoughts remained in my head..
Had kopi(or teh for me - which explains why i'm still so alert at 1055pm) with 2 frens today. She, of my age and recently quit her job and he, graduating in 4 months' time and starting his search for his first job.
Which is more important in one's job? Passion or Money? And we came out with 2 theories, ceteris paribus(i never thot i'll ever use this term again since i left sch!)
The 50-50 theory : Equal weightage to both; Passion so that you won't dread working and hopefully you can stay long(dare i say life-long?) in the job? Money so that you can pay off watever debts(sch loans!) and save lotsa money and hopefully retire early so that you can pursue your passion?
In other words, no conclusion, go toss coin
The declining scale theory : Start with 90% money 10% passion(too cruel to do a job with 0% passion)..then with every job change, lower the percentage for money and up the percentage for passion.
In other words, quit after 5-6 years when the % for money decreases, not necessarily replaced by passion but a new factor 'xian-ness'(as suggested by anecdotal evidence)
Not exactly scientific..but definitely relevant..
Thursday, 31 January 2008
'Hush is the word' - ST, 26th Jan 08
As edited by ZXL :
We hear a great deal about freedom of speech but what about freedom of silence?
As The Atlantic corresponent Jonathan Rauch says, 'As an introvert, I belong to one of the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.'
Being introverted does not necessarily mean being shy; it just means that people tire you out. While extroverts need company like the Energizer Bunny needs batteries, introverts recharge by spending time alone.
But Rauch makes it clear that introverts don't harbour a grudge against the rest of the human race: 'We love people..We just can't socialise with them all the time. We want to hold their hand or hug them or just sit quietly and read a book with them.'(Or in my case, just read my blog..)
What introverts don't want to do is go to parties and make small talk.
But the world is filled with people who do - and they set the standard for what is considered normal and desirable behaviour. Some introverts learn to keep up with a stream of conversation but those who can't or won't tend to be labelled as shy, aloof or arrogant.
Rauch notes that female introverts have a harder time because people don't usually think of women when you say 'strong, silent type'
It's not that introverts have no personality, it's just at the other side of the spectrum whereby somebody who can break into Elvis impersonation at the drop of a hat.
According to Rauch, if introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place. In a world run by introverts, no meeting would last over an hour because they don't think by talking; they think by thinking.
Rauch recommends helping extroverts to be comfortable with their opposites. It can be hard to relax with another person when silences keep breaking up a conversation. But not if you understand that 'if someone is being quiet it doesn't mean they're having a bad time; it doesn't mean they're lonely or need psychiatric help or medication'.
If you're an extrovert, be confident that the introvert next to you is enjoying your company. If he isn't, don't worry about it. It's not like he's going to tell you.
So, it's time to raise some awareness. Start by sending this article to 25 people within the next 3 days. Failure to do so will mean being trapped at 75 parties where people won't stop talking to you.
We hear a great deal about freedom of speech but what about freedom of silence?
As The Atlantic corresponent Jonathan Rauch says, 'As an introvert, I belong to one of the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.'
Being introverted does not necessarily mean being shy; it just means that people tire you out. While extroverts need company like the Energizer Bunny needs batteries, introverts recharge by spending time alone.
But Rauch makes it clear that introverts don't harbour a grudge against the rest of the human race: 'We love people..We just can't socialise with them all the time. We want to hold their hand or hug them or just sit quietly and read a book with them.'(Or in my case, just read my blog..)
What introverts don't want to do is go to parties and make small talk.
But the world is filled with people who do - and they set the standard for what is considered normal and desirable behaviour. Some introverts learn to keep up with a stream of conversation but those who can't or won't tend to be labelled as shy, aloof or arrogant.
Rauch notes that female introverts have a harder time because people don't usually think of women when you say 'strong, silent type'
It's not that introverts have no personality, it's just at the other side of the spectrum whereby somebody who can break into Elvis impersonation at the drop of a hat.
According to Rauch, if introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place. In a world run by introverts, no meeting would last over an hour because they don't think by talking; they think by thinking.
Rauch recommends helping extroverts to be comfortable with their opposites. It can be hard to relax with another person when silences keep breaking up a conversation. But not if you understand that 'if someone is being quiet it doesn't mean they're having a bad time; it doesn't mean they're lonely or need psychiatric help or medication'.
If you're an extrovert, be confident that the introvert next to you is enjoying your company. If he isn't, don't worry about it. It's not like he's going to tell you.
So, it's time to raise some awareness. Start by sending this article to 25 people within the next 3 days. Failure to do so will mean being trapped at 75 parties where people won't stop talking to you.
Sunday, 27 January 2008
The debate continues(sort of)..and then it turns to goat's milk..
RQ : colleague and I just discussed a problem. Without going into details, suffice to say that the gist of it is whether you would extend yourself to make life easy for someone else while at the same time running the risk of being held responsible if
the extension doesn't work out. I said no, no point. Just do things in normal mode.She probably thinks I'm nasty...haha...=P I wondered if this reaction is schooled by experience? Hmm...if I were a freshie, would I have reacted differently?
Sam : On the scenario u mentioned - Depends on what you wish to achieve. If u make life easier for most people thereby translating into effficiency and increased productivity for the organisation, yeah why not? U doing a good thing. But yeah, this day and age, we typically not so selfless. Everything at work is done with an agenda in mind.. hahah... simply because we don't have the free bandwidth to help anyone else except ourselves.
u see.. the worst kind of predicament u can be in is u worked hard and others are climbing up at the expense of your hardwork. : ) I told myself I will not let that happen to me (anymore). U compare ard, there are those who are just good at talking n not doing and they get far... haha.. strange world. So if u indeed wanna excel and get the accolades from your peers, I believe the hard work cannot be obliterated. Btw, this morning I switched to goats' milk - erm.. almost puke. The smell v v strong. I had to gulp one mouthful, then swallow another mouthful of water. :P had to down a fisherman thereafter.. yicks.. how how? 3/4 more litre to go!
RQ : I dunno, more of like I'm simply tired of doing stuff like that...hmm...I don't really chap if pple climb using my work, cos I know I answer to someone else. Interesting, I think I should go figure out why I'm like that...=) hey, where are you getting goat's milk from? I can get fresh for you if you like, the farm quite near my place.
ZXL : Erm..ya, the goat's milk i tried wasn't tat bad..they come in choc flavour too..
the extension doesn't work out. I said no, no point. Just do things in normal mode.She probably thinks I'm nasty...haha...=P I wondered if this reaction is schooled by experience? Hmm...if I were a freshie, would I have reacted differently?
Sam : On the scenario u mentioned - Depends on what you wish to achieve. If u make life easier for most people thereby translating into effficiency and increased productivity for the organisation, yeah why not? U doing a good thing. But yeah, this day and age, we typically not so selfless. Everything at work is done with an agenda in mind.. hahah... simply because we don't have the free bandwidth to help anyone else except ourselves.
u see.. the worst kind of predicament u can be in is u worked hard and others are climbing up at the expense of your hardwork. : ) I told myself I will not let that happen to me (anymore). U compare ard, there are those who are just good at talking n not doing and they get far... haha.. strange world. So if u indeed wanna excel and get the accolades from your peers, I believe the hard work cannot be obliterated. Btw, this morning I switched to goats' milk - erm.. almost puke. The smell v v strong. I had to gulp one mouthful, then swallow another mouthful of water. :P had to down a fisherman thereafter.. yicks.. how how? 3/4 more litre to go!
RQ : I dunno, more of like I'm simply tired of doing stuff like that...hmm...I don't really chap if pple climb using my work, cos I know I answer to someone else. Interesting, I think I should go figure out why I'm like that...=) hey, where are you getting goat's milk from? I can get fresh for you if you like, the farm quite near my place.
ZXL : Erm..ya, the goat's milk i tried wasn't tat bad..they come in choc flavour too..
Wednesday, 23 January 2008
The workaholic vs the workaholic
Below is an extract of an actual email exchange(unedited to retain the flavour) between 2 of my frens(i'm more of a onlooker)
Qi : i raise 2 hands and 2 feet to support you. don't be a slave to work, get off on time daily. If your work doesn't allow you to, then either improve your efficiency or reduce the workload. Life is so much more than work...
Sam : Easy to comment on that. They pay u salary for a reason. : ) U wanna get ahead, u also need to throw in effort. That's life. So something's gotta give, and it all depends on your priority.
Qi : haha...that's why zxl and i are...super slackers? =P yup, it all depends on your priority...but remember that at one's deathbed, no one ever regrets not spending one more day in the office...I think...
ZXL : wah...tat sounds very 'me'..ha..but if u're a super slacker...i dunno wat i am..haha
Qi : u are...err...champion slacker? *grin*...no choice lah, our choice of profession v different mah, but now that I in civil service, can be like that lor...hee...did I ever tell you guys that my very first appraisal in singapore I kenna told off by my boss for leaving office on time every day? =))
Sam : haha.. u 2 dun fight to be super slackers ok. : ) definitely on death bed won't think abt work.. : ) But ur boss is so strange?! old firm or this one? I only scold and warn people when they dun come in on time, but never when they leave on time, unless they are late and need to make up.
Qi : no fight, hats off to zxl, she more champion than me...hee...old firm. I told him that I don't see the need to stay late if I can complete my work within the alloted time. Anyway at that time I see a lot of colleagues staying late for the sake of staying late, just to impress boss kind. I think that's silly, refused to follow suit. Hee, prob boss buay tahan me...
Sam : U shld have told ur boss off : ) Tell him... err.. throw me more work? :P Once a partner asked an ex collaegue of yc why he is working late, he got a reply - 'doing work lah. I don't do u do is it?' have to give it to him :P But of cos having said that and being a slave driver myself, just circumstance, as much as I'd like to do less work, first the demand must be less than I can supply less. I'm resigned to fate this is the problem - demand more than supply.
Qi : hyuk, here's where I throw the problem back to management: demand > supply? increase supply, else accept a slower rate of completion. Can't have your cake and eat it too cos I'm not gonna do OT FOC man....not if I can help it anyway...
Sam : u so gungho... usually the throw back at mgmt, when that happens means when
we quit. : ) Have to be realistic. With proper planning, most things can do one. Just
pass me resources, think can manage. But with more resources, bottomline we receive also becomes thinner. (read: B) The problem is poor mgmt or a lousy boss. U ask me to treat the root of issue? Fire them, get the next better player. Hmm..interesting debate.
Qi : no debate lah, sometimes I know it's shen1 bu4 you2 ji3, but sometimes it really does boil down to how you want to conduct your life. Just hope i'm wise enough to do the right thing whenever I'm confronted with such decisions...=)
Sam : yup.. quite a fruitless debate? It's the kind with no answers.
ZXL : true lah..there's no right or wrong..more of 'the norm'(ie. climb the corporate ladder) and the 'path less taken'(take things easy at the expense of material gains)
Qi : i raise 2 hands and 2 feet to support you. don't be a slave to work, get off on time daily. If your work doesn't allow you to, then either improve your efficiency or reduce the workload. Life is so much more than work...
Sam : Easy to comment on that. They pay u salary for a reason. : ) U wanna get ahead, u also need to throw in effort. That's life. So something's gotta give, and it all depends on your priority.
Qi : haha...that's why zxl and i are...super slackers? =P yup, it all depends on your priority...but remember that at one's deathbed, no one ever regrets not spending one more day in the office...I think...
ZXL : wah...tat sounds very 'me'..ha..but if u're a super slacker...i dunno wat i am..haha
Qi : u are...err...champion slacker? *grin*...no choice lah, our choice of profession v different mah, but now that I in civil service, can be like that lor...hee...did I ever tell you guys that my very first appraisal in singapore I kenna told off by my boss for leaving office on time every day? =))
Sam : haha.. u 2 dun fight to be super slackers ok. : ) definitely on death bed won't think abt work.. : ) But ur boss is so strange?! old firm or this one? I only scold and warn people when they dun come in on time, but never when they leave on time, unless they are late and need to make up.
Qi : no fight, hats off to zxl, she more champion than me...hee...old firm. I told him that I don't see the need to stay late if I can complete my work within the alloted time. Anyway at that time I see a lot of colleagues staying late for the sake of staying late, just to impress boss kind. I think that's silly, refused to follow suit. Hee, prob boss buay tahan me...
Sam : U shld have told ur boss off : ) Tell him... err.. throw me more work? :P Once a partner asked an ex collaegue of yc why he is working late, he got a reply - 'doing work lah. I don't do u do is it?' have to give it to him :P But of cos having said that and being a slave driver myself, just circumstance, as much as I'd like to do less work, first the demand must be less than I can supply less. I'm resigned to fate this is the problem - demand more than supply.
Qi : hyuk, here's where I throw the problem back to management: demand > supply? increase supply, else accept a slower rate of completion. Can't have your cake and eat it too cos I'm not gonna do OT FOC man....not if I can help it anyway...
Sam : u so gungho... usually the throw back at mgmt, when that happens means when
we quit. : ) Have to be realistic. With proper planning, most things can do one. Just
pass me resources, think can manage. But with more resources, bottomline we receive also becomes thinner. (read: B) The problem is poor mgmt or a lousy boss. U ask me to treat the root of issue? Fire them, get the next better player. Hmm..interesting debate.
Qi : no debate lah, sometimes I know it's shen1 bu4 you2 ji3, but sometimes it really does boil down to how you want to conduct your life. Just hope i'm wise enough to do the right thing whenever I'm confronted with such decisions...=)
Sam : yup.. quite a fruitless debate? It's the kind with no answers.
ZXL : true lah..there's no right or wrong..more of 'the norm'(ie. climb the corporate ladder) and the 'path less taken'(take things easy at the expense of material gains)
Monday, 7 January 2008
080108
Writer's Block - Facing one these days..it's not tat i want to neglect my blog or i'm lazy to blog..a couple of times, i logged in to my site and after i clicked on 'new post', my fingers received no instructions from the brain and thus remained still on the keyboard..
Facebook - Or maybe my brain has gone soft on me now that there's facebook to occupy my online time..just go in and click..Buy people beer - click. Send someone flowers - click. Very easy..very no-brainer..
Long-time-no-see-no-hear-frens - Found a few thru facebook..or rather, they found me..probably cos my name didn't change(a couple of them added ang moh names, so i was totally clueless as to who they are) and my face remained the more or less the same(another few who totally looked nothing like how i knew them waaaay back - some claimed it's the makeup, others said it's due to DI..others gave no excuse - 'put on over the years lor')
Facebook - Or maybe my brain has gone soft on me now that there's facebook to occupy my online time..just go in and click..Buy people beer - click. Send someone flowers - click. Very easy..very no-brainer..
Long-time-no-see-no-hear-frens - Found a few thru facebook..or rather, they found me..probably cos my name didn't change(a couple of them added ang moh names, so i was totally clueless as to who they are) and my face remained the more or less the same(another few who totally looked nothing like how i knew them waaaay back - some claimed it's the makeup, others said it's due to DI..others gave no excuse - 'put on over the years lor')
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