'Hush is the word' - ST, 26th Jan 08

As edited by ZXL :

We hear a great deal about freedom of speech but what about freedom of silence?

As The Atlantic corresponent Jonathan Rauch says, 'As an introvert, I belong to one of the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.'

Being introverted does not necessarily mean being shy; it just means that people tire you out. While extroverts need company like the Energizer Bunny needs batteries, introverts recharge by spending time alone.

But Rauch makes it clear that introverts don't harbour a grudge against the rest of the human race: 'We love people..We just can't socialise with them all the time. We want to hold their hand or hug them or just sit quietly and read a book with them.'(Or in my case, just read my blog..)

What introverts don't want to do is go to parties and make small talk.

But the world is filled with people who do - and they set the standard for what is considered normal and desirable behaviour. Some introverts learn to keep up with a stream of conversation but those who can't or won't tend to be labelled as shy, aloof or arrogant.

Rauch notes that female introverts have a harder time because people don't usually think of women when you say 'strong, silent type'

It's not that introverts have no personality, it's just at the other side of the spectrum whereby somebody who can break into Elvis impersonation at the drop of a hat.

According to Rauch, if introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place. In a world run by introverts, no meeting would last over an hour because they don't think by talking; they think by thinking.

Rauch recommends helping extroverts to be comfortable with their opposites. It can be hard to relax with another person when silences keep breaking up a conversation. But not if you understand that 'if someone is being quiet it doesn't mean they're having a bad time; it doesn't mean they're lonely or need psychiatric help or medication'.

If you're an extrovert, be confident that the introvert next to you is enjoying your company. If he isn't, don't worry about it. It's not like he's going to tell you.

So, it's time to raise some awareness. Start by sending this article to 25 people within the next 3 days. Failure to do so will mean being trapped at 75 parties where people won't stop talking to you.